Giving Advice Doesn’t Work. Here is What is Better.

Cathie Leimbach • June 10, 2021

As a leader, you want to empower your employees to be independent thinkers, work through issues and come up with the best solution. This helps your team develop and grow professionally.  In addition, it allows your organization’s goals and objectives to be met much more efficiently. 

 

Employees who are trusted to think through issues effectively feel heard, appreciated, and are more engaged. They want to show up and do their very best work every day.

 

When employees approach you with a problem or challenge, it can be easy to jump in and provide what you are sure is the “perfect” advice. Here’s why that doesn’t work:

 

  • It’s judgmental. It sends the message that you are the smartest one in the room because they would have already figured it out if they were. This ultimately breaks down confidence and leaves the employee feeling “less than.”


  • Advice is a directive. When you give advice, you are telling someone what to do. That implies you have all of the answers about what works and what doesn’t. How could you? Chances are you don’t have all of the background in the situation, nor do you have a complete understanding of your employee’s thought process, experience, and skills.


  • It sets up a “gotcha” dynamic. When you give advice, you give your employee two choices: take the advice or ignore it. If they take it, they are tacitly admitting you are right, and they are wrong.  You are almost guaranteed to create defensiveness. When advice is ignored, it invites the possibility of an “I told you so.” Neither of these scenarios supports your employee’s confidence or skill development.


  • It shuts your employee down. Unsolicited advice means your employee will not only not be open to hearing you, he or she will also be much more hesitant to open up with their opinions and insights in the future.


  • Your employee ends up being discouraged from thinking through solutions. They stop trying to think on their own. Strong teams are made up of members who can use critical thinking and expertise to analyze issues and craft viable solutions. 

 

So, if giving advice doesn’t work, what does? The answer lies in (a) asking probing, open-ended questions to help your employee think through the issues and (b) always asking permission before giving advice. 

 

  • Use probing, open-ended questions to gather as much information and insight as possible.  For example:

“Share with me what your thoughts are about the situation.”

“What do you think the underlying problems are?”

“What options have you uncovered to overcome the challenge or solve the problem?”

 

Using open-ended probing questions helps your employee or team think through all of the elements of a particular situation.

 

  • Ask permission before giving any advice.  Let’s say that your employee has outlined all of the possible options they have considered, and you see one more. For example, you could say:

“I appreciate your summary and insights. I thought of one more option; may I share it with you.”

“I am wondering if I may share something else that came to mind while we were talking.”

“I can think of another option.  Would you like to hear it?”

 

Two tools to banish the advice trap.


  • Empower your employees by encouraging their analysis and identifying options and solutions through probing questions to develop stronger, more effective employees. That is a win-win-win for you, them, and your organization. 

 

  • Asking permission before offering options or solutions creates a consensus-building conversation and communicates the respect you have for your employees’ input and ideas.

 

If you would like some additional help identifying ways to empower your employees, reach out for a free breakthrough consultation at cathie@agonleadership.com.

The Empty Chair Is Trying to Tell You Something

By Cathie Leimbach • August 18, 2026
An empty workstation gets your attention. What caused it should keep your attention. When attendance becomes a problem, the first response is often to review the policy, document the absence, or find someone to cover the shift. Those things may be necessary. But they don't tell you why the problem is happening. A conversation might. Instead of starting with “Why do you keep calling off?” try “I've noticed you've missed several days recently. What’s going on?” Then listen. You may hear about something outside of work. But you may also discover frustration with a supervisor, conflict with a coworker, unclear expectations, scheduling difficulties, or an employee who no longer feels valued. Understanding the reason doesn't mean ignoring attendance expectations. It means you know what you're actually dealing with. Also, look for patterns. Is absenteeism higher on one shift? In one department? Under one supervisor? Did it increase after a schedule or leadership change? Those patterns may tell you where another conversation needs to happen. Most importantly, don't wait until attendance becomes a disciplinary issue to start talking. Check in with employees. Ask what's making their work harder. Ask what they need from their supervisor. And when someone raises a concern or makes a suggestion, be sure to tell them what action you are taking or why their idea won’t be implemented. The goal isn't to eliminate accountability. It's to address problems before accountability is the only conversation left. Conversation is Where Leadership Happens™ You Don't Need to Go It Alone. Bring your workplace people challenges to the FREE Workplace Conversations Clinic on September 21. Gain insights from Cathie Leimbach and other attendees. Register here for the FREE Workplace Conversations Clinic 

Is Absenteeism a Pain in Your Pocket?

By Cathie Leimbach • August 10, 2026
Absenteeism is expensive. Every unexpected absence costs more than a day's wages. Someone else may need to work overtime. Priorities get reshuffled, service slows, projects fall behind, and customers notice. Before long, absenteeism starts taking money right out of your pocket. That's why many organizations turn to attendance policies, incentives, disciplinary action, or tighter oversight. But what if those approaches are addressing the symptom rather than what's really going on? Most people don't wake up one morning and suddenly decide they don't care about their work. Disengagement usually happens gradually. People stop sharing ideas. They stop feeling heard. They begin doing only what's required. Eventually, some stop showing up. By the time absenteeism is brought to your attention, the real issue may have been growing for weeks—or even months. If absenteeism has become a recurring challenge, don't just ask, "How do we reduce call-offs?" Instead, ask "What happened before people stopped wanting to show up?" That question may lead you somewhere an attendance report never will—and may ultimately save far more than overtime costs. Attendance problems. Accountability. Difficult conversations. Team conflict. Every leader faces workplace people challenges, and few have been taught exactly what to do when they arise.  Talking through your challenges with others can be helpful. Ask questions of your network. Get some ideas online. Sometimes another perspective is exactly what you need to see the situation differently. You Don't Need to Go It Alone. Bring your workplace people challenges to the FREE Workplace Conversations Clinic on August 17. Gain insights from Cathie Leimbach and other attendees as you explore practical ways to handle the situations you're facing. Register here for the FREE Workplace Conversations Clinic