Self-Reflection Questions for Personal Growth

Cathie Leimbach • October 1, 2024

Written by John Maxwell

Asking personal leadership questions is one of the most powerful and effective things you can do to improve your life and your leadership.

Great self-accountability questions often stem from a difficult situation in our lives. As people, our natural tendency when dealing with a challenge of some kind is to become frustrated. That moment of frustration presents us with a tremendous opportunity to ask self-leadership questions that help us leverage challenging situations.

John Maxwell calls these “crucible moments,” and they can be powerful teachers. We can up-level our leadership and make better choices in the moment by practicing self-reflective questions before responding.

Here are 3 simple guidelines for creating your own personal leadership questions (PLQs):

1.       Begin with “what” or “how” – avoid “why” “when” or “who.”

The word “why” in problem-solving or selling can be helpful. But when it comes to personal reflection, the “why” word can leave you powerless and feed victim thinking. Asking yourself “what” or “how” will stimulate more productivity.

 Example: “What did I love? What did I learn?”

 

2.       Contain an “I” – avoid “they,” “them” or “we.”

“I” questions enable you to be assertive and help you take responsibility for your own actions. Using “we” instead of “I” gives you an opportunity to pass the blame if something goes wrong. “I” questions also help you become aware of problematic or redundant behavior. You will take responsibility for your own thoughts when you use “I” questions.

 Example: “How is my heart? Do I love what I am doing?”


3.       Focus on action – avoid inaction.

Effective leaders make an intentional effort to prompt action in themselves through personal leadership questions. They gain insight through reflection and hold themselves accountable to turn insight into action. A question is only as productive as what it drives you to do. It’s important that we are honest with ourselves and then focus on how to grow.

Example: “How can I better live out my values in my day-to-day life?”

Nobody understands you better than you. But you have to be honest with yourself in order to grow.

The Empty Chair Is Trying to Tell You Something

By Cathie Leimbach • August 18, 2026
An empty workstation gets your attention. What caused it should keep your attention. When attendance becomes a problem, the first response is often to review the policy, document the absence, or find someone to cover the shift. Those things may be necessary. But they don't tell you why the problem is happening. A conversation might. Instead of starting with “Why do you keep calling off?” try “I've noticed you've missed several days recently. What’s going on?” Then listen. You may hear about something outside of work. But you may also discover frustration with a supervisor, conflict with a coworker, unclear expectations, scheduling difficulties, or an employee who no longer feels valued. Understanding the reason doesn't mean ignoring attendance expectations. It means you know what you're actually dealing with. Also, look for patterns. Is absenteeism higher on one shift? In one department? Under one supervisor? Did it increase after a schedule or leadership change? Those patterns may tell you where another conversation needs to happen. Most importantly, don't wait until attendance becomes a disciplinary issue to start talking. Check in with employees. Ask what's making their work harder. Ask what they need from their supervisor. And when someone raises a concern or makes a suggestion, be sure to tell them what action you are taking or why their idea won’t be implemented. The goal isn't to eliminate accountability. It's to address problems before accountability is the only conversation left. Conversation is Where Leadership Happens™ You Don't Need to Go It Alone. Bring your workplace people challenges to the FREE Workplace Conversations Clinic on September 21. Gain insights from Cathie Leimbach and other attendees. Register here for the FREE Workplace Conversations Clinic 

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By Cathie Leimbach • August 10, 2026
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