When Managers Help by Asking Questions
Cathie Leimbach • July 29, 2020
This is a subtitle for your new post
How do you structure meetings with your direct reports? Do you give them their assignments for this week and then adjourn the meeting? Or, do you encourage two-way conversations by asking open-ended questions to learn about the successes, joys, and challenges in their personal life and their work responsibilities?
A manager's job is to serve the needs of their staff, to support them to be personally successful and contribute to the organization's success. Asking your employees open-ended questions is the best way to understand their needs.
Asking 'What would you like to talk about today?' or 'How can I help you be successful this week?' opens the door for your team members to share their bottlenecks. Open-ended questions, such as those that start with the '5 Ws' or 'How' allow your direct report to set the agenda for the discussion. When you know what is limiting their performance, you can help close their gaps in knowledge, skills, or tools so they can be more productive.
What open-ended questions could you ask your team members in your next one-on-one meetings?
Most leaders know they should give feedback. Yet many avoid it. Not because they don't care, but because they worry they'll discourage someone, create conflict, or say the wrong thing. Unfortunately, when feedback is delayed, vague, or avoided, employees don't feel supported—they feel uncertain. Research highlighted in a recent McKinsey Quarterly article found that employees who receive regular, specific feedback are significantly more engaged than those who don't. The problem isn't that employees dislike feedback. They dislike feedback that feels judgmental, unclear, or disconnected from their growth. The strongest leaders understand something important: Feedback isn't a download. It's a dialogue. When leaders approach feedback as an employee development conversation rather than a list of mistakes, people become more open to hearing hard truths and more motivated to improve. Effective feedback communicates two powerful messages at the same time: I respect you. I believe you can grow. That combination changes everything. The best leaders don't simply evaluate past performance; they help employees see future potential. Rather than focusing only on what went wrong, they provide feedforward —guidance on what someone can do to become even more successful. High-performing organizations understand a simple truth: Improvement requires input. The question for leaders isn't whether to give feedback. It's whether our feedback leaves people feeling smaller—or stronger. Feedback doesn't change people. Better conversations do. Download our one-page guide: 5 Practices That Turn Feedback Into Growth Learn five practical ways to make every feedback conversation more productive, more encouraging, and more likely to inspire lasting growth. Conversation is where leadership happens
Most leaders want better performance. They want employees who take ownership, meet expectations, solve problems, and continue growing. Yet many leaders seldom initiate performance conversations – and when they do, it doesn’t go well. Leaders often hesitate because they fear discouraging people. Employees, meanwhile, don't know if they are missing the target. This can be costly. Research highlighted in McKinsey's Courageous Conversations article found that organizations with strong performance practices are four times more likely to outperform their peers. Yet fewer than one-third of employees believe performance reviews actually help them improve. The problem is not just a lack of performance conversations. It's a lack of clarity. The article points to a simple but powerful distinction: separate the hardware of performance from the software of performance. The hardware includes facts, goals, KPIs, commitments, timelines, and standards. The software includes tone, timing, relationships, empathy, and intent. When leaders clearly explain the facts while delivering them with care and respect, employees become more receptive to improvement. Strong leaders don't judge people—they diagnose work. They focus on behaviors, actions, and results rather than character. They clarify expectations, provide coaching, and create frequent opportunities for alignment. In high-performing cultures, clarity isn't viewed as criticism. It is viewed as support. As the article notes, "Clarity is a kindness, and ambiguity is a burden." Employees deserve to know where they stand, what success looks like, and how to improve. When leaders provide that clarity with dignity and respect, performance conversations become growth conversations. And growth is where better results begin. Download the Performance Conversations: Hardware & Software Checklist for Leaders and learn how to have everyday performance discussions that include opportunities for growth, accountability, and stronger results.